Amateur Night
by Mystical Light
Summary: Season 5. Stopping a monster at a Strip for Charity benefit. Featuring Team Free Will in all their glory.


Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural. I am not making any money from writing this - it is purely for my enjoyment of writing.

I do not regret this at all. I'm just saying that right off the bat. This is a combination of a monster I'd like to see the show tackle, seeing gifs from one of the show's cons and reading another story about stripping earlier today. It vaguely takes place in Season 5. Enjoy.

* * *

Dean needed to look twice before he was sure of what he was reading.

"You've gotta be kidding me," he groaned, rubbing a hand against his face as he stared hard at the computer screen.

"What? Something wrong with the case?" Sam asked, stepping out of the bathroom after showering and tossing his toiletries bag into his duffle.

"That bar we were going to scout is doing a night long charity benefit."

"A lot of people means extra cover. What's so bad about that?"

Dean gave him a look and Sam knew he wasn't going to like whatever would come out of his brother's mouth next.

* * *

It was a stroke of inspiration to Dean but Sam really wanted to kill his brother. He should've never opened his big mouth.

"Dean, I'm not doing this," Sam said through clenched teeth.

"Um, yes you are. I just told you, you were."

"It's embarrassing."

"Suck it up. Be a man."

"Dean - I am not going to _strip for charity_. Who does that?"

"Hey, it's amateur night and you are an amateur. Unless you did something cool in college to pay for books and never told me about it. Now get backstage and get yourself prepared."

"No. If I do it, you do it."

"I have to scout the bar!"

"No - you want to pick up women and you're using "scouting" as an excuse."

"Since when do you do air quotes? That's so douchey."

Sam sighed and pushed his hair back from his eyes. "Did you talk to Cas?"

"Left him a message," Dean said while giving Sam a gentle push towards the stage door.

Sam gave Dean the mightiest bitchface he could as he went off and Dean laughed all the way to the bartender and ordered a drink.

* * *

"And next up is Number 25!" the DJ announced.

Backstage, Sam blew out a deep breath of air. He'd found a chair to sit on and his leg bounced up and down as he stared at the other people getting ready to do this.

"Charity. This is for charity. And to stop a gorgon," he repeated several times under his breath.

The big red number 30 on his chest felt like it was on fire. He got up and went to look through the curtain when someone put a hand on his shoulder. Sam spun around and there stood Castiel.

"Cas - what're you doing here?"

"Your brother contacted me about your case."

"No - I know why you're here. I mean, why are you here with me? Dean's out there scouting so you should go with him -"

"The creature is somewhere nearby."

Sam was about to ask how Castiel knew that when he spun in a slow circle, the angel's eyes taking in the scene. He stopped and began to walk towards a young woman, maybe two or three years younger than Sam with dark hair and alabaster skin that was so pale that she looked green under the lights. And was also scheduled to go on stage next. Sam watched as she took one look at Castiel and her eyes flashed red as she walked out on stage. Castiel followed and after a moment's hesitation Sam walked over to the curtain and watched.

* * *

"Here's Number Twenty - hey, one at a time!"

Dean casually looked up from the girl he was chatting up to see a hot looking girl walk out on stage followed by... "Cas?"

The angel was reaching into his pocket and out came the handle of a knife but he was forced to drop it as the woman walked over to him and began to remove his tie. The DJ turned up the music and the woman brought the tie around Cas' back, keeping him in place. Bending backwards, she brought her head all the way back until her head almost touched the floor, still holding onto the tie which was now just below Castiel's ass which Dean didn't want to think about it.

"Now that's flexible," the girl with Dean said in jealousy.

And the girl with Cas wasn't finished yet. She walked around Castiel (his head following her every move) and brought his trench coat off of his shoulders and dropped it to the floor. Why wasn't the idiot angel getting away?

"Shit," Dean said none too quietly.

He excused himself and ran to help his friend. Dean ran through the backstage door and was almost to the stage when a hand grabbed his arm and stopped him. He spun around ready to punch the bastard when he realized it was his brother.

"Sam - what the hell? Why aren't you helping him?"

"Cas could handle one gorgon - he is an angel."

Dean turned to look at Castiel and something didn't seem right. Under the lights the angel looked way too pale and was he breathing? "Shit; she mojo'd him!"

"What?" Sam asked, looking.

Dean pointed at the pair. "He's not moving. He's not breathing. Bitch turned Cas to stone!"

Sam muttered a quiet, "Shit," and looked back at Dean with worry. "What're we going to do?"

Dean didn't want to do this but…"All right. I've got an idea."

* * *

The angel was weak, much weaker than she expected since he was falling under her spell. She opened her mouth, ready to take in more of his glorious essence when someone grabbed her by the shoulder. She turned and found a very tall and handsomely built shirtless young man who pulled her back and twirled her in time with the music.

He led her off the stage to the side where no one was. No witnesses. She rounded on him and hissed as her eyes flashed. From behind his back he removed an impressively sized machete that he swung at her neck like a baseball bat.

* * *

Castiel blinked in the bright lights and took a deep breath. What had just happened?

"Cas. Psst...Cas."

Castiel turned and Dean was standing just behind him.

"You okay man?"

Castiel nodded and flexed his fingers. "That was...unpleasant."

"Yeah, I bet. Turning to stone isn't something I'd say was fun."

"Indeed."

"Hey," a woman shouted from the crowd that lay out before them, "this is a charity benefit. Not a Grade School dance. Give us a reason to donate some money, boys!"

Something that could be described as music began playing and Dean turned to walk off the stage but everyone booed.

"Take it off!" another woman shouted, this one waving a dollar bill at them.

"I was afraid of this...Cas, follow my lead."

"Follow your -?"

"Suit jacket first, then the shirt underneath."

"Why...?"

"Just do it."

Dean turned around to face the wall and slowly began removing his flannel over shirt which he tossed into the crowd where, from the intensity of squealing, a woman had caught it.

Castiel did the same with his suit jacket though he didn't bother to turn to the wall. He looked to his right and saw a young woman with kind eyes that, upon looking at her, Castiel knew that she had dreams of going to the New York and performing on something called BROADWAY…whatever that was. Castiel handed his jacket off to her. She blushed in response and smelled it.

Dean then removed his black tee-shirt, swung it around his head a few times as if it were a rope and threw that into the crowd as well. After someone caught it, Dean shouted, "I'm gonna kinda want that back later," to which several people laughed.

Castiel looked down at the buttons on his dress shirt and, instead of undoing each one, he simply ripped the shirt open and let it fall. If anything the cheering got louder and Castiel even heard Dean make a loud choking noise to his right. The air felt strangely cold against his naked chest. He preferred it with the shirt on to without. It was at that moment when another woman climbed up onto the stage and, approaching Castiel, placed a piece of currency into his belt. She gave him a kiss on the cheek and jumped off the stage to rejoin a group of women who appeared to be her friends.

"Dean! Cas!"

Dean and Castiel turned to find Sam (once again wearing his own shirt) motioning for them to leave the stage. Dean gave the crowd what appeared to Castiel to be an exaggerated bow with large sweeping motions of the arm before walking off. Castiel just simply bowed his head and left to many cheers.

"Gorgon dead?" Dean asked.

"Yeah she just...when did you get your clothes back, Cas?" Sam asked, looking at Castiel in astonishment.

Castiel looked down at his tie, dress shirt and suit jacket and then up again. "Just now," Castiel said adjusting the lapels of his trench coat and leaving the two struck mute Winchester brothers to stare.

"What I wouldn't give for the ability to do that. Of course, I'd pick better clothes."

Sam rolled his eyes at his brother and left.

"Wait, Sam, I've gotta get my shirts back. Sam. I'm cold. Sam!"

* * *

Thanks very much for reading. Hope you had enjoyable mental pics while reading this (I know I did from writing it!) Leave me a review and I'll give you a nice reply. Have a nice weekend. :)


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